Six Funny LIfe Lessons

Credits: Personal Blog of Carl Pei

Below are 6 very funny and true life lessons to be learned that I’ve received via email. Jokes aside, the insight gained is valuable to everyone and I somehow don’t think you’ll regret reading them.

Lesson 1: Naked Wife

A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next door neighbor. Before she says a word, Bob says, “I’ll give you $800 to drop that towel.” After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob.

After a few seconds, Bob hands her $800 dollars and leaves. The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs. When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks,…

“Who was that?” “It was Bob the next door neighbor,” she replies. “Great!” the husband says, “Did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?”

Moral of the story:If you share critical information pertaining to credit and
risk with your shareholders in time, you may be in a position to prevent
avoidable exposure.

Lesson 2

A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out. The Genie says, “I’ll give each of you just one wish” “Me first! Me first!” says the admin. clerk. “I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world.” Poof! She’s gone. “Me next! Me next!” says the sales rep. “I want to be in Hawaii,relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and the love of my life.” Poof! He’s gone. “OK, you’re up,” the Genie says to the manager. The manager says, “I want those two back in the office after lunch.”

Moral of the story: Always let your boss have the first say.

Lesson 3

A priest offered a lift to a Nun. She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to reveal a leg. The priest nearly had an accident. After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg. The nun said,”Father, remember Psalm 129?” The priest removed his hand. But,changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again. The nun once again said, “Father, remember Psalm 129?” The priest apologized “Sorry sister but the flesh is weak.” Arriving at the convent, the nun went on her way. On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129. It said, “Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory.”

Moral of the story: If you are not well informed in your job, you might miss a
great opportunity.

Lesson 4

A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A rabbit asked him,”Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day long?” The crow answered: “Sure, why not.” So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested.

A fox jumped on the rabbit and ate it.

Moral of the story: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very
high up.

Lesson 5: Power of Charisma

A turkey was chatting with a bull “I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree,” sighed the turkey, but I haven’t got the energy.” “Well, why don’t you nibble on my droppings?” replied the bull. “They’re packed with nutrients.” The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a fourth night, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree. Soon he was spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree.

Moral of the story: Bullshit might get you to the top, but it wont keep you
there.

Lesson 6

A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field. While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was. The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.

Moral of the story:1. Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy2. Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend3. And when you’re in deep shit, it’s
best to keep your mouth shut!

*EXTRA* Lesson 7: Popularity can be harmful (by Digg user outhouseinput )

A man decides to write a funny and informative collection of stories meant to drive home some interesting life lessons. While he was writing them, his wife came by and asked what he was doing. He explained to her that he wanted to send his friends something interesting to chat about at work the next day. His wife advised him to post it on an internet blog for fun. The husband took her advice, but negligently set up his own server without properly analyzing the potential for an instantaneous burst of Digg traffic. The site, therefore, went down in flames hosting a few paragraphs of text.

Moral of the story:Don’t listen to your wife.

21 Critical Life Lessons You Didn’t Learn in School

Credits: John Place online

If someone doesn’t take us aside and teach us a few things (assuming we’d listen) before we graduate high school, we are doomed to learn life’s hardest lessons in the real world beyond the classroom.

With that in mind, here are 21 non-academic lessons every person should know before he or she graduates high school; if you graduated long ago (as I did), this list represents all the things you wish you had been taught, yet had to learn (or are still learning) on your own.

Love and Relationships

1. Choosing a Mate: Your ability to select a suitable spouse will greatly influence your financial and emotional wellbeing, yet parents and teachers seldom mention it. A few common sense guidelines: pick someone who’s a joy to be around and who makes you happy; know the person well; ensure compatibility beyond the physical because beauty and youth are fleeting, while the mind and heart endure.

2. Evaluating Relationships: Given the tremendous importance of relationships, it’s surprising we receive so little instruction on how to evaluate, prune, and nurture them. Start by asking yourself whether each of your relationships drags you down or lifts you up. Surrounding yourself with positive relationships is half the battle.

3. Conversation: Successful relationships require solid communication: use body language, appropriate tone of voice, and eye contact; be friendly and considerate of alternative viewpoints; persuade gently; listen, listen, listen.

4. Handling Difficult People: An essential life skill, handling difficult people can be taught, but seldom is. I’ve written about this before, and there are several good books on the subject, including Robert Bramson’s Coping with Difficult People.

5. Networking: Ask for business cards, maintain a Rolodex (electronic or otherwise), and stay in touch with people who respect you. Association breeds opportunity, personally and professionally.

6. Compassion: We are born egocentric, but by the time we graduate high school, we should be capable of understanding, appreciating, and sympathizing with others. Compassion helps us understand our place in the world and ensures we are emotionally well rounded.

7. Teamwork: Work environments have gravitated toward small teams. Sports, team projects, and group goals are great ways to learn teamwork, but are seldom adequate. Evaluate interpersonal skills regularly; correct as needed.

8. Giving: As a child, I always thought the expression “it’s better to give than to receive” was trite and silly. As an adult, I recognize the expression’s value. Having the capacity to give means you possess; having the will to give means you want to make a difference; having the desire to give means you care.

Money Management

9. The Material Myth: Pursuing happiness by acquiring material things (granite countertops, plasma televisions, designer clothing) is like jogging to the grocery store on your treadmill: it’s not going to happen.

10. Saving: Keep 3 to 6 months salary in an emergency fund, in case you lose your job; use online calculators to determine the proper amount to save for retirement; keep money on hand for unexpected expenses, such as car and home repair.

11. Debt: Financial gurus suggest that total debt, excluding first mortgage, should not exceed 20% of take-home pay. This includes car payments, home equity loans, second mortgages, credit card debt, and so forth. Upper income consumers may be able to handle higher debt loads due to greater expendable income, while lower income consumers may be wise to carry less. And my number one rule of debt: credit cards should never be used as supplemental income.

12. Frugality: Live below your means. Look for bargains. Shop at discount stores. Clearly delineate needs (transportation) from wants (a big SUV). Feel free to indulge occasionally, but mind the consequences.

13. Debtor Responsibility: I believe every person who borrows money has a social, moral, and ethical responsibility to make payments on time and in the correct amount for the duration of the contract. Generally speaking, the credit bureaus agree.

Career

14. Passion: School sharpens skills, but seldom taps into your most powerful reserve of all: Passion. If you want to be happy at the top of Maslow’s pyramid, find a job you love.

15. Practicality: While you’re chasing self-actualization, paying bills remains important. Independent research using the Occupational Outlook Handbook or other resources can help you figure out how to make a living in whatever industry inspires you.

16. Politics of Advancement: Advancement in the working world often depends as much upon interpersonal skills as it does upon job skills. Persuasion, argument, and expectation setting are crucial.

17. Entrepreneurial: Unless you’re related to business owners or have learned about business ownership on your own, there’s a good chance that owning a business seems puzzling, daunting, and overwhelming. The fact that young people in a capitalistic society aren’t given the basic tools of ownership is unfortunate. Find a mentor. Attend a workshop. Read.

Personal Success

18. Positive Thinking: Attitude determines altitude. If you believe you can do it, most of the time, you really can.

19. Personal Accountability: Most success boils down to perseverance, determination, tenacity, and other products of personal accountability.

20. Setting and Achieving Goals: Goal setting, research, planing, commitment, and hard work are all required to reach any big, life-altering objective. In other words, all the schooling in the world won’t help you reach your dreams if you don’t take time to determine what you want and how to obtain it.

21. Health: Throughout my life, I’ve noticed that no single thing does as much to improve my outlook as getting healthy. Eat nutritious meals in proper portions. Drink plenty of water. Try to get 30 minutes of aerobic exercise daily (or at least every other day). Get plenty of sleep. High school health classes teach these concepts, but seldom make the connection between health and the rest of life; the connection is real. And it’s huge.

So there you have it: 21 lessons you can’t (or generally don’t) learn in school.

These lessons are not intended to insult teachers or schools, or to suggest curriculum. They are merely thought starters; something to think about regarding lessons learned through painful experience.

Life is an exploration, and maybe certain lessons must be experienced to be understood. Yet I wonder how much pain we could prevent if we taught life’s important lessons to our young people instead of relying on the real world to teach them for us.

Inspirational Quotes about Lesson in Life

Credits: Indian Child

I've learned that we don't have to change friends if we understand that friends change.

I've learned that no matter how good a friend is, they're going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that.

I've learned that true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance. The same goes for true love.

I've learned that you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life.

I've learned that it's taking me a long time to become the person I want to be.


I've learned that you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them.

I've learned that you can keep going long after you can't.

I've learned that we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.

I've learned that either you control your attitude or it controls you.

I've learned that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades and there had better be something else to take its place.

I've learned that heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences.

I've learned that money is a lousy way of keeping score.

I've learned that my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time.

I've learned that sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you're down, will be the ones to help you get back up.

I've learned that sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel.

I've learned that just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.

I've learned that maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you've had and what you've learned from them, and less to do with how many years you have lived.




I've learned that it isn't always enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself.

I've learned that no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn't stop for your grief.

I've learned that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.

I've learned that just because two people argue, it doesn't mean they don't love each other And just because they don't argue, it doesn't mean they do love each other.

I've learned that you shouldn't be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life forever.

I've learned that two people can look at the same thing and see something totally different.

I've learned that your life can be changed in a matter of hours by people who don't even know you.

I've learned that even when you think you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you you will find the strength to help.

I've learned that credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being.

I've learned that the people you care about most in life are sometimes taken from you too soon

Prayer for a Happy Death

By Corazon C. Aquino
Philippine Daily Inquirer
First Posted 03:41:00 07/10/2009

Filed Under: Cory Aquino, Health

Almighty God, most merciful Father
You alone know the time
You alone know the hour
You alone know the moment
When I shall breathe my last.

So, remind me each day,
most loving Father
To be the best that I can be.
To be humble, to be kind,
To be patient, to be true.
To embrace what is good,
To reject what is evil,
To adore only You.

When the final moment does come
Let not my loved ones grieve for long.
Let them comfort each other
And let them know
how much happiness
They brought into my life.
Let them pray for me,
As I will continue to pray for them,
Hoping that they will always pray
for each other.

Let them know that they made possible
Whatever good I offered to our world.
And let them realize that our separation
Is just for a short while
As we prepare for our reunion in eternity.

Our Father in heaven,
You alone are my hope.
You alone are my salvation.
Thank you for your unconditional love, Amen.

Tea Cup

There was a couple who used to go to England to shop in the beautiful stores. They both liked antiques and pottery and specially teacups. This was their twenty-fifth wedding anniversary. One day in this beautiful shop they saw a beautiful teacup. They said, "May we see that? We've never seen one quite so beautiful." As the lady handed it to them, suddenly the teacup spoke. "You don't understand," it said. "I haven't always been a teacup.

There was a time when I was red and I was clay. My master took me and rolled me and patted me over and over and I yelled out, 'let me alone', but he only smiled, 'Not yet'.

Then I was placed on a spinning wheel," the teacup said, "and suddenly I was spun around and around and around. "Stop it! I'm getting dizzy!" I screamed. But the master only nodded and said, 'Not yet'.

Then he put me in the oven. I never felt such heat. I wondered why He wanted to burn me, and I yelled and knocked at the door. I could see him through the opening and I could read his lips as he shook his head 'Not yet'.

Finally the door opened, he put me on the shelf, and I began to cool. 'There, that's better,' I said. And he brushed and painted me all over. The fumes were horrible. I thought I would gag. 'Stop it, stop it!' I cried.

He only nodded, 'Not yet'.

Then suddenly he put me back into the oven, not like the first one. This was twice as hot and I knew I would suffocate. I begged. I pleaded. I screamed. I cried. All the time I could see him through the opening nodding his head saying, 'Not yet'.

Then I knew there wasn't any hope. I would never make it. I was ready to give up. But the door opened and he took me out and placed me on the shelf. One hour later he handed me a mirror and said, 'Look at yourself'. And I did. I said, 'That's not me; that couldn't be me. It's beautiful. I'm beautiful.' 'I want you to remember, then,' he said, 'I know it hurts to be rolled and patted, but if I had left you alone, you'd have dried up. I know it made you dizzy to spin around on the wheel, but if I had stopped, you would have crumbled. I knew it hurt and was hot and disagreeable in the oven, but if I hadn't put you there, you would have cracked. I know the fumes were bad when I brushed and painted you all over, but if I hadn't done that, you never would have hardened; you would not have had any color in your life. And if I hadn't put you back in that second oven, you wouldn't survive for very long because the hardness would not have held. Now you are a finished product. You are what I had in mind when I first began with you.'

Pains, trials, difficulties in life. A combination of triumphs and tragedies. That's what life is all about and sometimes the blows keep coming.

Guess what's happening? The Master is putting us - His clay into the oven in order to break us, mold us and form us into His image. God knows what He's doing (for all of us). He is the Potter, and we are His clay. He will mold us and make us, so that we may be made into a flawless piece of work to fulfill His good, pleasing, and perfect will.

Think about it. Our every area of strength comes from our past "oven-experience." This is why we're strong today and that strength, is used to help others and bring glory to His name.

The visually impaired Helen Keller says "I thank God for my handicaps, for through them, I have found myself, my work and my God." Warren Wiersbe noted that when God permits his children to go through the furnace, he keeps his eye on the clock and his hand on the thermostat.

He's not done with you yet. You're still a work in progress.

Life Lessons

Credits: West Hartford Counseling Center


I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is be someone who can be loved. The rest is up to them.

I've learned that no matter how much I care some people just don't care back.

I've learned that just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.

I've learned that it takes years to build up trust, and only seconds to destroy it.

I've learned that it's not what you have in your life, but whom you have in your life that counts.

I've learned that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.

I've learned that we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.

I've learned that either you control your attitude or it controls you.

I've learned that sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel.

I've learned that maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you've had and what you've learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you’ve celebrated.

I've learned that two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.

I've learned that no matter how good a friend is, they're going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that.

I've learned that it isn't always enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself.

I've learned that just because two people argue, it doesn't mean they don't love each other. And, just because they don't argue, it doesn't mean they do.

I’ve learned that no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn’t stop for your grief.

I’ve learned that no matter how you try to protect your children, they will eventually get hurt, and you will hurt in the process.

I've learned that you should never tell a child their dreams are unlikely or outlandish. Few things are more humiliating, and what a tragedy it would be if they believed it.

I've learned that heroes are people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences.

I’ve learned that you can keep going long after you can’t.

26 Life Lessons Learned by Age 26

Credits: Marc and Angel Hack Life

Here is a list of 26 life lessons I have learned thus far at the age of 26. I pass this list on to you with the simple hope that it makes you think. Sometimes thinking about your life and sorting out what you have learned is just as important as tackling a new venture.

1. Being an adult can be fun when you are acting like a child.


2. Love has nothing to do with looks, but everything to do with time, trust, and interest.


3. Laughing, crying, joy and anger… All are a vital. All make us human.


4. The greatest truths in life are uncovered with simple, steady awareness.


5. Greed will bury even the lucky eventually.


6. Bad things do happen to good people.


7. Paving your own road is intelligent only if nobody has gone exactly where you are going.


8. Uncertainty is caused by a lack of knowledge. Hesitation is the product of fear.


9. Time heals all wounds… regardless of how you feel right now.


10. Most of the time what you are looking for is right in front of you.


11. Your health is your life.


12. Chance is a gift, so act on chance when given the opportunity.


13. Kindness and hard work will take you further than intelligence.


14. People deserve a second chance, but not a third.


15. Marry your best friend.


16. Take lots of pictures. Someday you’ll be really glad you did.


17. Money makes life easier only when the money is yours free and clear.


18. Carelessness is the root of failure


19. Your actions now create memories you will reminisce and talk about in your elder years.


20. Stepping outside of your comfort zone will put things into perspective from an angle you can’t grasp now.


21. Motivation comes in short bursts. Act while it’s hot.


22. Purposely ignoring the obvious is like walking backwards toward the enemy.


23. Taking ownership of failure builds the foundation for success.


24. First impressions are completely worthless 50% of the time.


25. Personal glory lasts forever.


26. If you never act, you will never know for sure.

Biggest room in the world is the room for improvement

A blind boy sat on the steps of a building with a hat by his feet. He held up a sign which said: 'I am blind, please help.' There were only a few coins in the hat.

A man was walking by. He took a few coins from his pocket and dropped them into the hat. He then took the sign, turned it around, and wrote some words. He put the sign back so that everyone who walked by would see the new words.



Soon the hat began to fill up. A lot more people were giving money to the blind boy. That afternoon the man who had changed the sign came to see how things were. The boy recognized his footsteps and asked, 'Were you the one who changed my sign this morning? What did you write?'



The man said, 'I only wrote the truth. I said what you said but in a different way.' What he had written was: 'Today is a beautiful day and I cannot see it.'

Do you think the first sign and the second sign were saying the same thing?

Of course both signs told people the boy was blind. But the first sign simply said the boy was blind. The second sign told people they were so lucky that they
were not blind. Should we be surprised that the second sign was more effective?


Moral of the Story:

Be thankful for what you have. Be creative. Be innovative. Think differently and positively.

Invite others towards good with wisdom. Live life with no excuse and love with no regrets. When life gives you a 100 reasons to cry, show life that you have 1000 reasons to smile. Face your past without regret. Handle your present with confidence. Prepare for the future without fear. Keep the faith and drop the fear.

Great men say, 'Life has to be an incessant process of repair and reconstruction, of discarding evil and developing goodness…. In the journey of life, if you want to travel without fear, you must have the ticket of a good conscience.'

The most beautiful thing is to see a person smiling… And even more beautiful is, knowing that you are the reason behind it!!!

"Biggest room in the world is the room for improvement"

God's Boxes

I have in my hands two boxes,
Which God gave me to hold.
He said, "Put all your sorrows in the black box,
And all your joys in the gold."

I heeded His words, and in the two boxes,
Both my joys and sorrows I stored,
But though the gold became heavier each day,
The black was as light as before.

With curiosity, I opened the black,
I wanted to find out why,
And I saw, in the base of the box, a hole,
Which my sorrows had fallen out by.

I showed the hole to God, and mused,
"I wonder where my sorrows could be!"

He smiled a gentle smile and said,
"My child, they're all here with me."

I asked God, why He gave me the boxes,
Why the gold and the black with the hole?

"My child, the gold is for you to count your blessings,
The black is for you to let go."

THE DONKEY ATTITUDE

One day a farmer's donkey fell down into a well.
The animal cried piteously for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do.
Finally, he decided the animal was old, and the well needed to be covered up anyway;
it just wasn't worth it to retrieve the donkey.



He invited all his neighbors to come over and help him.
They all grabbed a shovel and began to shovel dirt into the well.
At first, the donkey realized what was happening and cried horribly.
Then, to everyone's amazement he quieted down.

A few shovel loads later, the farmer finally looked down the well.
He was astonished at what he saw.
With each shovel of dirt that hit his back, the donkey was doing something amazing.
He would shake it off and take a step up.



As the farmer's neighbors continued to shovel dirt on top of the animal,
he would shake it off and take a step up.
Pretty soon, everyone was amazed as the donkey stepped up
over the edge of the well and happily trotted off!

MORAL:

Life is going to shovel dirt on you, all kinds of dirt.
The trick to getting out of the well is to shake it off and take a step up.
Each of our troubles is a steppingstone.
We can get out of the deepest wells just by not stopping, never giving up!
Shake it off and take a step up.



Remember the five simple rules to be happy:

1. Free your heart from hatred - Forgive.
2. Free your mind from worries - Most never happens.
3. Live simply and appreciate what you have.
4. Give more.
5. Expect less from people but more from God.

MARRIAGE

When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly.

She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why? I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Dew. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company.

She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Dew so d early. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Dew.

When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a
month's time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day.

She requested that everyday for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Dew about my wife's divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.

My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She
closed her eyes and said softly; don't tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest.. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had
done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me.

On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Dew about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily..

Suddenly it hit me... she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mum out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom,
through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy.

I drove to office... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind... I walked upstairs. Dew opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I do not want the divorce anymore.

She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other any more. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding
day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart.

Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.

At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

God promises a safe landing...

Awesome!! We complain about the cross we bear but don't realize
it is preparing us for the dip in the road that God can see and we can't.

Whatever your cross, whatever your pain,
there will always be sunshine, after the rain....

Perhaps you may stumble, perhaps even fall;
But God's always ready, to answer your call....

He knows every heartache, sees every tear,
a word from His lips, can calm every fear...

Your sorrows may linger, throughout the night,
But suddenly vanish, dawn's early light...

The Savior is waiting, somewhere above,
to give you His grace, and send you His love...

God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage.

Interview With Rick Warren

He wrote the Purpose Driven Life.

You will enjoy the new insights that Rick Warren has, with his wife now having cancer and him having 'wealth' from the book sales. This is an absolutely incredible short interview with Rick Warren,

'Purpose Driven Life ' author and pastor of Saddle back Church in California

In the interview by Paul Bradshaw with Rick Warren, Rick said:

People ask me, What is the purpose of life?

And I respond: In a nutshell, life is preparation for eternity. We were not made to last forever, and God wants us to be with Him in Heaven.

One day my heart is going to stop, and that will be the end of my body-- but not the end of me.

I may live 60 to 100 years on earth, but I am going to spend trillions of years in eternity. This is the warm-up act - the dress rehearsal. God wants us to practice on earth what we will do forever in eternity.

We were made by God and for God, and until you figure that out, life isn't going to make sense.

Life is a series of problems: Either you are in one now, you're just coming out of one, or you're getting ready to go into another one.

The reason for this is that God is more interested in your character than your comfort; God is more interested in making your life holy than He is in making your life happy.

We can be reasonably happy here on earth, but that's not the goal of life. The goal is to grow in character, in Christ likeness.

This past year has been the greatest year of my life but also the toughest, with my wife, Kay, getting cancer.

I used to think that life was hills and valleys - you go through a dark time, then you go to the mountaintop, back and forth. I don't believe that anymore.

Rather than life being hills and valleys, I believe that it's kind of like two rails on a railroad track, and at all times you have something good and something bad in your life.

No matter how good things are in your life, there is always something bad that needs to be worked on.

And no matter how bad things are in your life, there is always something good you can thank God for...

You can focus on your purposes, or you can focus on your problems:

If you focus on your problems, you're going into self-centeredness, which is my problem, my issues, my pain.' But one of the easiest ways to get rid of pain is to get your focus off yourself and onto God and others.

We discovered quickly that in spite of the prayers of hundreds of thousands of people, God was not going to heal Kay or make it easy for her- It has been very difficult for her, and yet God has strengthened her character, given her a ministry of helping other people, given her a testimony, drawn her closer to Him and to people.

You have to learn to deal with both the good and the bad of life.

Actually, sometimes learning to deal with the good is harder. For instance, this past year, all of a sudden, when the book sold 15 million copies, it made me instantly very wealthy..

It also brought a lot of notoriety that I had never had to deal with before. I don't think God gives you money or notoriety for your own ego or for you to live a life of ease...

So I began to ask God what He wanted me to do with this money, notoriety and influence. He gave me two different passages that helped me decide what to do, II Corinthians 9 and Psalm 72.

First, in spite of all the money coming in, we would not change our lifestyle one bit.. We made no major purchases.

Second, about midway through last year, I stopped taking a salary from the church.

Third, we set up foundations to fund an initiative we call The Peace Plan to plant churches, equip leaders, assist the poor, care for the sick, and educate the next generation.

Fourth, I added up all that the church had paid me in the 24 years since I started the church, and I gave it all back. It was liberating to be able to serve God for free.

We need to ask ourselves: Am I going to live for possessions? Popularity?

Am I going to be driven by pressures? Guilt? Bitterness? Materialism? Or am I going to be driven by God's purposes (for my life)?

When I get up in the morning, I sit on the side of my bed and say, God, if I don't get anything else done today, I want to know You more and love You better. God didn't put me on earth just to fulfill a to-do list. He's more interested in what I am than what I do.

That's why we're called human beings, not human doings..

Christian cartoons - Learn and enjoy!

When You Pray, Give God Your Hurts - Daily Devotional

by Rick Warren

"If you forgive others the wrongs they have done to you, your Father in heaven will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others, then your Father will not forgive the wrongs you have done" (Matthew 6:14-15 TEV).

 

 

In your life, you will be hurt by others; sometimes intentionally, sometimes unintentionally. How you handle that hurt determines your happiness. When you bottle up hurt in your life and hold onto it, that is called resentment. If somebody hurt you years ago and you're still holding onto it, it will poison your life. For your own health and happiness, you must learn to forgive.

The Bible says forgive and be forgiven. In fact, Jesus says, "If you do not forgive others, then your Father will not forgive the wrongs you have done" (Matthew 6:15 TEV). They're inter-related. It reminds me of the story where someone told John Wesley, the founder of Methodism, "I just can't forgive that person! They hurt me too badly." Wesley's response was, "Then I hope you never sin."

For your own sake, let go of the past. If somebody hurt you, let go of it, release them. That's one of the values of prayer. It helps you unload. Forgiveness is the only way to get rid of the past. Forgive them and let it go. Get on with life. Forgiveness erases the videotape of that hurt memory that keeps playing over and over in your mind.

In my own marriage, the times I've felt closest to Kay, the times of most intimacy and oneness, have been times after a major blow up. We've worked the thing through, we've both confessed to each other and asked forgiveness, and then we pray together. The oneness that comes out of that kind of experience just can't be explained.

When we let go of our hurts and forgive others, we are reflecting the grace of our heavenly Father who forgave us and continues to forgive us. It means we've given God our love; we've given God our lives, and, in doing that, we worship God.